teenage boys love me.

but old latino men love me more.

faux amis

there are a lot of false friends between spanish and english vocab. for example, "assistir a" does not mean "to assist". it means "to attend", as in attending an event.

dunno what this is called, but there are some words that don't just translate between spanish and spanish, depending on which country.

ada told me a story about her brother-in-law, who was a singer in church. once during a celebratory even, he ended his song with, "let's all go eat cake!"

puerto ricans call cake, "bicocho".

mexicans use the word, "pastel".

to mexicans, "bicocho" is the word for male private parts.

there happened to be lots of mexicans at church that day.

awkward.

moral of the story: know the people! know the culture! know the language!

a happier post

i should prolly change the name of this blog to allez philly, coz my life currently is in kensington among other neighbourhoods.

anyway, there are a bunch of new froyo places. i don't think i'm a foodie. and i don't think i'm a froyo fanatic. but it is a good tart treat once in a while.

yesterday my roommie and i went to yogurt city. it's the newest one and incidentally the chinese-owned one. very typical - there are the originals, then the chinese knock-off with greater variety of flavours and lower prices. it was so-so. the yogurt was a little too melty. because we struck up convo, the owner gave me a $3 gift card for free. even though my mandarin really sucked. and even though i insisted that i wasn't chinese because i am taiwanese and only speak 'min-nan-hua'. surprisingly he didn't argue! and respected my identity. he was also surprised that we chose to live in chinatown coz he considers that 'hood as 'dirty'.

chinatown is really dirty and smelly and laden with litter. but, it's cheaper, and because it is so smelly, i've noticed that there are less people living on the sidewalks asking for money or cigarettes. the smelliness kinda reminds me of taiwan night market, though, i hear it's cleaner these days... haven't seen one since 1996. oh my!

ugh

my roommie emails us this morning a news story that there was a raping that occurred yesterday night (at 9:30 p.m.) 2 blocks from our place. basically girl was waiting for the bus at the train station, was dragged between two buildings, choked/strangled then raped. the perpetrator was caught on surveillance tape, running away in boxers. so, he left his pants for the cops, in which contained his walled and a driver's license. who knows if it's the correct id though. it's a mexican driver's license from puebla. the girl is alive, already discharged from the hospital.

another girl who was walking her dog at the time called the cops after hearing screaming noises. the surveillance camera shows three guys walking through the parking lot and turning around to give a puzzled look at the dude running away without pants.

i'm not sure what i would do in that situation. i would hope that i would react to screaming and that i would summon help. i wish that i had super strength to kick ass if someone were attacking someone or myself.

my roommie then reminds us to carry pepper spray. ugh.

met up with a friend today and we prayed for the city. too many crazies here!

time to watch some kung fu movies.

the diversity of humanity

as a health care provider, i have the opportunity to meet people from all walks of life. in a short time i've been able to hear lots of life stories. or maybe it's something that just comes with age.

last weekend on the bus - i normally don't talk to people on the bus - but the woman next to me told me her life story. it was quite interesting.
-studied life sciences in the philippines, came to the states at age 22 hoping to go to medical school, ended up nannying for rich oil folks in texas, a cousin told her the money was better nannying for rich people in manhattan, so she moved up to the city. she nannied for madonna's lawyer in the 80s. got married. had a son. divorced 2 years later. raised her son on her own in jersey. found a job at a medical publishing company. moved down to philly. remarried 4 years ago. contemplating divorce again because she doesn't want to deal with her husband's children: son age 26, in and out of jail and in and out of drug rehab; daughter age 20 with a 4 year old daughter, baby's daddy is not giving any child support, daughter became a lesbian and has new girlfriend; ex-wife struggling with bi-polar disorder.

anyway, people on the street are like the tips of icebergs. we really have no idea what kind of life stories people have hiding there.

i was able to share a little bit about what i was doing in philly. she was a little thrown-off and surprised, so that's good. i love shattering people's ideas of young professionals. she shared that she wished she could one day volunteer and do something to help improve the life of others. i immediately thought of her husband's family, who is in need of help, but it would totally inconvenience her lifestyle if she were to commit to help them. so i replied, "yeah, i guess it's easier to help people if you don't have to live with them" - in reference to my patients, but also implying her step-family. she laughed. (she actually laughed at everything she and i said - my type of person!)

chill out, philly!

without fail, at least once every day an annoyed driver honks at me. it doesn't matter if i am walking or driving. someone will undoubtedly toot. it's usually because i'm in their way, or i waited 1 nanosecond after the light turned green to cross the intersection. i've grown used to it. i like to think that they are just being friendly and saying 'hello there!', or maybe they think that i look like someone they know, since i have many asian look-alikes. i like to pretend that philadelphians are really laid-back and don't have anger management issues.

today within the span of five hours i've encountered the epitome of uptight east coaster. so i had some comp time this afternoon because i worked last saturday. it turned out great because i needed a break. and alex was in town visiting with his cousins, luke and kevin. i caught up with them at independence hall. apparently this is the only block in the entire city where jaywalkers are reprimanded. i was thinking i could cross the cobblestone road in the middle of the block, and the moment i stepped off the curve i heard a whistle. naturally it caught my attention, i looked up and across the street was a PPD officer, dressed up as a park ranger waving his finger at me. i gave him a pouty look, turned around and walked the other way.

after getting a cheesesteak at jim's and water ice at rita's i went home. then shortly thereafter went to the art museum w/ nancy. currently there is a renoir exhibit. very inspiring! however, i was a little flabbergasted in the beginning because as nancy and i were chatting, this woman behind me shushed us - "sssh!!!" meanwhile there was really loud live jazz music coming from the atrium. i didn't know that there was no talking allowed in an art museum. or maybe this lady had dreams of becoming a librarian but never got to live them out. or maybe this lady is constantly on edge, like lives with 20 grandchildren and developed a compulsive shushing reflex to any type of chatter.

the end.

i brought my business card and a toothbrush for marvin at turner's bakery today. we're going to become friends.

no matter what i order - 3 items, 4 items... - he always says, "for you, baby, that'll be a dollar!"

[he calls everyone "baby".]

definitely beats the prices at rittenhouse coffee shops. -_-

no such thing as "i'm fine, thank you" anymore!

dunno why but had a lot of "not that great" or "sorta getting better" in response to "como estas?" today.

-one patient responded with "my brother was just killed in a car accident and my cousin was shot to death last weekend." a drunk driver ran into her uncle's car somewhere in jersey, killing her brother and leaving her uncle in critical condition. her cousin was shot five times in his apartment building by two 14-year olds in the projects of new york. one of them was caught and the police are still looking for the other one, who happens to be the nephew of her cousin's baby's mama. i hear the term 'baby's mama' way too often here!

-another with "my mother just had part of her lung removed because her breast cancer spread to her lung"

-my coworker was a little stressed because she will soon have her uncle move in with her and her family. her uncle was just released from prison after 25 years. he has cancer and liver problems. he is currently in a halfway home, where they do not provide meals. so, she must leave work early to pick up food for him before visiting hours are closed.

meanwhile we still laugh a lot all day long.

-last patient of the day had a huge hickey on her neck. but i always need to ask about anything unusual. so in the most casual way possible, "is everything okay right here?" pointing to the lesion. responded by, "oh yeah! i know i'm an old hag, but my boyfriend gave me a hickey."

aiya.

happy monday!

worked 5.5 days last week. it was kinda tiring. but there are a lot of people in the world who work 6 or 7 days.

everyone talks about the asian-american value of 'hard work'. honestly, my parents valued studying hard, and working hard, but the end value was security. i don't think i have it instilled in me to 'work hard', just for the sake of working. i'm not like the average american worker who doesn't use up their vacation days. on the contrary, i've already squelched all my accrued vacation to date. hahaha.

anyway, being in kensington - in a different culture from my own (primarily a different socio-economic culture), i've been examining my value system. what i was taught as 'the right way' from my culture, is a good way, because it is successful from our world's point of view, i suppose.

getting back to this discussion on work. i've spent a lot of time thinking about it, and why or why shouldn't i work. my conclusion is that my cultural values or parents' values, while i believe they are good, they should not supersede biblical values. i think hard work should not just be a means to security and comfort, and not for the sake of earning what we earn. but it's a biblical value, because God works hard.

meanwhile, it is biblical to rest, because the Lord also rests.

so, that's what i was thinking this morning on the way to work. i worked hard today. and now i am exhausted. and my computer battery and cell phone battery are also dying.

on a random note, i have that 'imma be' song stuck in my head. and am frantically trying to replace it with a better tune.

the tables have turned

had a really cute black kid today. he walked in very happy. i said "hello!"
then he responded with "hi!"
then i ask, "how are you?!"
and he smiles.
lots of kids don't say anything if they are shy. so i just assumed he was shy.
then i started introducing myself, explaining what we were going to do today, then asked him, "have you ever been to the dentist before?"

then he looks at me and says, "yo no hablo ingles!"

it was muy precioso.
then we switch to espanol.

anyway, i guess it was wrong to assume because he was black he would understand english. there are a lot of black puerto ricans, after all. and i shouldn't treat people unequally. i almost ALWAYS ask EVERYONE if they prefer espanol or english.

so, that is how people feel when they start speaking to me in chinese, and then i have to let them know that i have NO IDEA what they are sayin'.

life can change in an instant

jose (half my patients are named jose) came today. mom was a little concerned since he was in a nursing home for 11 months, and she believes that they never brushed his teeth.

run down on his med history: jose is 27 (like me!), but at 26 he had a stroke. they discovered he had an arteriovenous malformation (genetic disorder, where circulation is affected in the brain). so, he nearly died. but he says that "God is good!" and he is happy to be alive, despite his left side being paralyzed. mom has to take care of him, but med assistance provides a nurse 40 hours a week (paul, originally from ghana).

we tried to do as much work on him as possible today because it's kind of an ordeal getting him in and out of the wheelchair, in and out of the dental chair.

the first thing he said to me was, "you're very pretty!"
the second thing he said to me was, "you have beautiful eyes!" (can you even see my eyes? -__- i guess it's the only thing showing since we all wear masks here...)
the third thing he said to me was, "i liiiike you!"

i can only imagine how he behaved with the ladies before his stroke.

mom explained to me that jose was, is, and always will be 'a player'. jose agrees, as he wets himself in the chair and struggles to find a comfortable position using his right foot and right arm to move himself around. before his stroke, he fathered 4 children, and shoutouts to two babies' mamas. no marriage here. but, it's nice to hear that the moms bring the kids over to spend time with dad.

kudos to all the caregivers out there.
and kudos to all the survivors in healing out there.
be strong persevere!

didn't work that hard today, like dentistry-wise, but it was a big crying day.

r.e.e. was back after having a tooth extracted following a domestic abuse situation. he's in jail now. so the important thing is that she is in a safe place.

the dental team and i tend to talk about random things throughout the day, like, anything and everything. but i guess we should try to have a little more filter, maybe, or just be a little more sensitive to patients' listening ears. so, calvin was talking about how his mom is kinda clumsy and broke her wrist while they were on vacation. the whole family were riding bicycles. mom wanted to take a picture. and instead of stopping to get her camera out of her bag, she kept riding, ran into stacy and then fell down, breaking her wrist as she tried to break her fall.
then i responded with a story of my own mommy, who was daydreaming while backing the car out of the driveway, and ended up killing our tree. silly mommy!

i dunno if R was listening, but she started crying and said that her teeth wasn't her fault, that she was taking care of herself, but it was the man who did the damage. initially when i first met her, she didn't mention him. she talked about how she
very overwhelming. and i lift her up to you, Lord. but, anyway, i was a little discouraged as a new dentist that i took 90 minutes on one patient. i guess we do what we gotta do.

lastly, E came in at the end of the day. just making plain convo and asked if he had a lot of family in philly, since he's guatemalan. he responded with 'dos hijos'. so i followed-up with how old are they? he listed off a 6 year old and a 10-month year old. then mentioned he had one who passed away at 4 months. having all the candidness in the world with my dental mask on, ask, when did this happen? then i gotta take my mask off here. he explained that it happened in 2007. his son all of a sudden started crying. he wouldn't stop, so they took him to the er. they waited forever, and apparently were told they couldn't be seen until he brought a translator with him. finally the baby was admitted when he started convulsing. he ended up on life support for a month before dying. but E thinks that maybe he was already dead on the first day. lots of things were lost in translation. of course, he was devastated. finally he took off the patient sunglasses and we could see that he was crying. my spanish sucks. thankfully monin explained that there is comfort and hope in christ. then we prayed for him. a father never really gets over these things. but we had to listen and care even if it's after 5 p.m.

anyway, my parents friends were kinda saying how it was strange (but maybe they implied unfair) that i had to learn spanish to do my job. whereas everyone came from taiwan and learned english in order to make it in this country. yes, i feel the injustice towards them.
but i also feel the injustice towards an immigrant who has a baby who dies partly due to a language barrier.

a more atrocious injustice that's been on my mind since saturday is the sexual crimes against women going on in congo. so, after the genocide in rwanda a lot of people fled to the congo. subsequently many rebel groups and militias arose. so there's new ethnic tension going on. militias know that in order to destroy a people group, it is effective to destroy the women - since they are the backbone of communities, raising children and working in the fields. anyway, there is a crazy amount of rape and rape+torture. the torture part is when they introduce things like effing KNIVES and BAYONETS and STICKS into a woman's vagina after effing raping them. only God knows WHY. so, my new philly friends melanie and scott lived in the congo for a bit and made a documentary about it: www.womeninwarzones.org
i watched this on saturday at liberti. it was very moving, depressing and angering. yet, presented in a manner to inspire hope for change and hope for hope. sometimes we need hope for hope. it also made me miss french a lot. so, hopefully i can help out in some way, maybe writing some stuff in french or something.

speaking of philly connections, some other communities to pray for are the family of the young american man who was killed in uganda (in july) after terrorist bombings. he happens to be a childhood friend of a new philly friend from church.

also the medical team who was recently killed in afghanistan. one of the members is my coworker's cousin.

as i've moved to a bigger city, the world has become smaller, or more within reach. the only one who can bear this burden is Christ.

glimmers of hope

just saw the movie "eat pray love". it was agitating, to say the least.

so i'm going to post about something that makes me happy.

recently our new patient came in for a check-up. she's 20 and has a 2 year-old in foster care. what's nice is that she gets to see her baby. but it's still sad to be separated. i have hope for her, though, because she seems to be very disciplined as she's preparing for a navy entrance exam. she's working out consistently and also studying math on a daily basis. i'm proud of my patients who are finishing school and wanting to work hard, especially in an environment where everyone and everything seems to be against them.

anyway, going back to the movie, which was unexpected, but there's a scene where the man in india shares his story about not being a good father/husband and regretting his past mistakes; and therefore, trying to find healing and restoration. all this definitely requires time and self-reflection; however, christ really is the only one who can make things new.

not a typical day, but not too shocking either

walking down the stairwell to get some lunch and saw four cop cars blocking kensington in front of the clinic. there was a crowd of people gathering and murmuring. across the street in front of koolae there is a dude COVERED in blood, trying to stand up by himself. and older man is standing behind him, trying to help him not to fall. a police officer is talking to him. i run downstairs and ask jackson what the heck happened. apparently someone pulled up in a car, got out and started beating the crap out of this dude. i stood around and watched a while. i'm such a gawker! ha!

anyway, i think he's okay. i didn't see any ambulances.
later in the afternoon, rumours were spread that someone was murdered in front of our clinic. that is not true. just a story, embellished.

if that wasn't enough excitement, my emerg patient this afternoon came with a hole in his/her smile. one of the victims in this story!

in summary: teen is doing community service (as punishment), then decides to steal a POLICE CAR, is driving in a runaway chase, hits my patient's car, totaling both, and then causing another car to hit my patient's car.

note to police: do not leave ignition on with vehicle unattended, especially in the presence of youth who are undergoing corrective behaviour.

note to delinquent: do not steal a police car if you are already being punished by society for another crime.

anyway, so i spent a good amount of time restoring some teeth. and i had to practically do it upside down because my patient was suffering whiplash and could not recline more than 10 degrees.

time to get a massage.

some patient snapshots:

mom comes in with five of six kids all under age 7. lone girl wearing sundress. two boys wearing shorts, no shirt. one boy wearing shirt and diaper, no pants. and finally baby in stroller just wearing diaper. good thing we don't have a 'no shirt no service sign'. never seen a 'no pants no service' sign. it's been really humid in philly these days. these kids kinda reminded me of the kids in west africa who would be running around naked when it was laundry day.

---------------
today, notified pudgy pre-teen that he had cavities. he reflected for a moment, then responded with, "i think i know why. i get the munchies at night and have been chewing gum instead of snacking."
omg. so cute!
hahaha. he got the munchies. hahaha.
sad ending: his mom came and he informed her that he had cavities. she scolded him with a "no more candy for you!"
then, i said, "the bright side is that we can fill them, which is better than root canals or pulling them. and he needs to switch to sugar-free gum."
exasperated she replied, "i buy him sugar-free gum! but he sneaks in the other stuff!" (referring to bubblicious).
i tried to help the kid out, "well, at least he's chewing gum instead of constantly eating, because that wouldn't be good for his overall health."
then mom chided, "yeah! he's trying to lose some weight."
then, i gave up.

------------------
i'm chatting with big brother about flossing. little sister walks by and says, "hey! psst!"
and then big brother answers, "what?"
and then she goes, "you suck!" and walks away.
then big brother looks at me, whimpers and complains, "she's so mean to me!"
little sister wins! (finally!)
but i have a milligram of sympathy for big brother. then say, "i'm sorry to hear that." and then ask if he's nice to his younger siblings. then he goes, "yeah! sure! of course, i bother them all the time. but that's like any normal big brother."
A-HA! i don't know why big brother thinks that's "NORMAL". because bother will only lead to retaliation.

-------------------
last one for the day: two brothers 3 and 4 came with dad, who has tattoos on his entire upper body. they are both wearing different kinds of spiderman tees, bald, stocky, and tough. haha. precious! the older one was in the chair. and dad was giving him some instructions, like "no more candy for you!" or something. and then he lifts up his arms, palms face up and shoots a spiderweb at his dad. ahahaha. so i'm like, "dude! you can't do that to yer dad!" the kid grins and laughs his evil laugh. muhahaha.

back

encouraged by tafblogger andrew's LOL post to love non-taiwanese americans. cool!

today had some cool encounters:

rams is a teenager who plays on a street football team. it turns out all his friends are asian. so he's been picking up some vietnamese cuss words. hahaha. he also for some reason knows how to say 'black people' in cantonese. i asked why? and he replied coz his asian friends don't like black people. we had a discussion about this, and how the media negatively portrays different racial groups. and how my own aunt was a little wary about me moving to philadelphia because she heard that there are many black people here, even though my aunt and uncles' best friends and fellow elders at church are black. i'm nauseated as i think about this. anyway, i'm glad that rams is breaking some barriers. i hope to catch one of their games sometime. street league means: no refs. local kids make all the calls. no padding. tackle. 11 on 11. everyone must be under age 18.

saw rams' mom right after. and she says she likes that her son hangs out with the aZns because she believes that they keep him out of trouble. she confessed this to me apologetically as if to imply that she didn't want to typecast me as 'model minority' but she was going to anyway. i asked if he hung out with any puerto ricans, and she said, 'no! he'd prolly be on the streets by now if he did'. she was quick to diss her own people. but again, crime stats and media.

this afternoon brought j and little j. j is 17 and she is 3 yr old little j's mom. j is expecting another girl in november. dad didn't say much and appeared tough, but after a lot of effort i was able to make him crack a slight smile towards the end. he's prolly 19 or 20. but they both looked kinda old. i asked little j if she had any brothers or sisters, and she pointed to her belly while saying, "in here!" so cute! after we checked her teeth, she switches spots with mama and yells, "open your mouth now!" she then climbs on j's lap, and gives her belly a smooch. dah! more cuteness!

last notable of the day is 81 year old b, who is also a volunteer at the local christian school. she's living in the hood where we work. she is white. and her memory is super clear. she is sharp. she is the best. she loves the Lord. she writes thank you notes to our front desk. and she is awesome. too bad her teeth are decaying. ended up doing a very... lessay... creative filling to restore a molar.

in that moment i realized that i had crossed the line from being a T to an F, whereas in the past i was totally a T and was wavering back and forth the past few years. there's no way a T would do such herodontics.

tryin to have faith here.

trying to define justice today.
good to have 9 hours on the road tomorrow and think about this.
philly, see you soon!